Got A Minute Challenge

[yarroway.livejournal.com]

IMPORTANT NOTE:
LJ is creating duplicate entries to this challenge. If you delete the duplicate, the original will also be deleted.  Even if there are replies to it.


Srsly_yes will be by a little later to host a campfire chat (she's out stocking up on lighter fluid as we speak). Let's be sure to keep Wilson in the infirmary until she gets back! Got A Minute is a challenge cloudxsephiroth posted last summer, and it was so much fun we decided to run it again.

Now, we're going to use the honor system here, as you can cheat the game very easily to get the result you want, but where's the fun in that? I'm going to list 60 various diseases, illnesses, and whatever else I feel like, and what you have to do is simple. First, you create a blank/dummy post in response to this. Then, check to see at what minute your post was made. i.e. 7:04, so you would look at 04, check the list, see what the problem for Wilson is, and then either write a short paragraph involving Wilson and the problem, or create a picture showing it! Or even make a haiku of Wilson's problem! Anything will work as long as it relates to the chosen illness or problem. Have fun with it. Playing multiple times to get a different sickness is very much encouraged!

Two important notes. Please post all submissions as replies to this thread and not as separate entries (because that makes it much easier for us to track). Also if you post any NSFW images, kindly put them under a cut.


00: Sunburn
01: Kicked in the nuts
02: Hangover
03: Broken arm
04: Flu
05: Mugged
06: Run over
07: Insomnia
08: Violated by a cane
09: Paralysis
10: Paternity suit
11: Dropped hair dryer in bathtub
12: Blind
13: Erectile Dysfunction
14: Coming out/Outed
15: Struck by lightning
16: Flesh eating bacteria
17: Trapped in an elevator
18: Gangrene
19: Walking Corpse Syndrome
20: Shot
21: Falling down stairs.
22: Proposed... and got rejected.
23: Hallucinations
24: Stood up on a date
25: Spiders
26: Lost a tooth
27: Overdose
28: STD
29: Life in an M. Night Shyamalan movie
30: Drugged
31: Stressed
32: Cotard’s Syndrome
33: Lost
34: Fired
35: Poison ivy
36: Failed parachute
37: Wakes up missing a kidney
38: Cheating/Cheated on
39: Left at the altar
40: Embarrassing photos on internet
41: Fire
42: Snakes
43: Wins an award! They made a mistake.
44: Homeless
45: Ostiumtractophobia (Fear of doorknobs)
46: Monster under the bed
47: Dissociative identity disorder
48: Falls of roof
49: Car gets stolen
50: Frozen
51: Gets caught masturbating
52: Relives same day over and over
53: Insanity
54: Failed Suicide
55: Amputation
56: Parking space stolen
57: Flunks med school
58: Nightmare
59: Falls in love with a lab rat

Comments

[jezziejay.livejournal.com]

dummy post...

[jezziejay.livejournal.com]

Falling down the stairs...cool...back soon :)

[jahmat.livejournal.com]

Thanks, yarroway. Reposting here. (The English major likes poetry!)

Haiku for the prompt Overdose

Drugs and alcohol

Doctors should know better, right?

Wake to House holding my hand

[yarroway.livejournal.com]

That last line. Aww.

[deelaundry.livejournal.com]

50 - Frozen

James can't remember who it was who told him Montreal's winters were similar to New Jersey's, but he will remember and then he'll hunt that person down and shove icicles in every orifice. The weather hasn't been above freezing since James got back from Christmas Break, and by now, when he goes outside, his testicles crawl so far back into his body to avoid the cold that they're behind his rib cage. He's thinking about taking up skiing just to get some blood circulation going.

[yarroway.livejournal.com]

That would be a fitting punishment, actually. :)

[deelaundry.livejournal.com]

Forgot to mention this is in Wilson's first year at McGill.

[jezziejay.livejournal.com]

Ten are the number of stairs he falls down that leads to nine stitches, eight bruises, seven grazes, six carpet burns, five fractured fingers, four cracked ribs and three broken toes. Two are the number of items that had been carelessly left at the top of ten stairs – a satchel and a cane. One is the number of seriously annoyed oncologists.

One friend comes to see how he is, and laughs twice. Wilson snaps at him when he tries for a third. Four are the number of painkillers he takes before leaving the hospital at five am. The sixth taxi they flag stops for them. House says sorry seven times and Wilson responds with eight swear words. When they get home, Wilson can’t escape the apologetic kisses and concedes forgiveness on the ninth. And ten are the number of stairs they stagger back up.

[yarroway.livejournal.com]

Wonderful progression!

[yarroway.livejournal.com]

dummy post

[menolly-au.livejournal.com]

Dummy Post

[menolly-au.livejournal.com]

15. Struck by Lightning

Wilson watches the rain out of his office window. There is a lightning flash nearby, it lights up the office and then is gone as quickly. The thundercrack that follows shakes the glass. Rain continues to pelt against the windows but they hold firm, keeping the storm at bay.

Dying from a thymoma is rarer than being struck by lightning, he tells himself. He'll be fine. Everything is going to be okay.

[srsly-yes.livejournal.com]

Ooh! Very slick the way you got around to House.

[sassyjumper.livejournal.com]

Dummy

[sassyjumper.livejournal.com]

39 - Left at the altar

Wilson watched his mother dab the corners of her eyes with a hanky, clearly trying not to smudge her makeup. She had witnessed her son exchange vows on several occasions. But she’d never seen him stood up at the altar.

She must be so embarrassed, Wilson thought, not yet fully registering how he was feeling. Fourth and final marriage, he’d assumed. He’d never imagined House would be the first one to leave before the “I do.”

[deelaundry.livejournal.com]

OK, well, but... We have seen how quickly House runs off when he's had a medical epiphany. He probably was mentally practicing, "I do," and then he thought, "Aye. Dew. Scotland in the morning; the patient was on the Scotland heather moors last month; that means he's got --" and ran off to go save a life.

\o/

Don't worry, Wilson; he'll be back soon!

[mnstrtruckslash.livejournal.com]

dummy post

[mnstrtruckslash.livejournal.com]

20:18 Gangrene

“The test is positive,” House said. “Type 2 diabetes. Wilson stared at his foot in shock; he couldn’t believe this was really happening. He wasn’t overweight, or elderly, and yet there he was with a hunk of gangrenous flesh practically hanging off of his big toe. “This means we’ll have to cut way back on our drinking, and no more sweets, unless you start making stuff with that fake sugar in the yellow packets. But I think we can save the digit and otherwise you should be able to live a long and fairly normal life. One more thing; if you ever try and hide something this important from me again, I’m gonna cut off all of your toes.”

[mnstrtruckslash.livejournal.com]

that was funny. Here's for another one.

[mnstrtruckslash.livejournal.com]

this one is a little on the long side.


29: Life in an M. Night Shyamalan movie

“James, how are you doing today?” the pretty female doctor asked. She had medium length blonde hair, soft blue eyes, and was wearing a pearl necklace.

“Well I’m a little tired but otherwise okay, I think. House hasn’t showed up for a couple of days, which is weird. I tried calling…” Dr. Volakis—Wilson had to check her ID badge to remember her name—sighed. “James, we’ve discussed this before. Dr. Gregory House is a product of your disease. You developed schizophrenia during your last year of medical school. You’ve been in and out of facilities like this one ever since. The fact that you aren’t seeing House anymore is a very good sign.”

“No, he’s my best friend. We met in New Orleans in 1991. I was a medical conference. House is brilliant, and funny, and he’s the only friend I’ve ever had that likes me for who I am! There’s no way I imagined all the stuff we’ve done together. I’m not that creative.”

Dr. Volakis wrote something down on her legal pad and nodded. The glass wall behind her head was actually a two-way mirror. Behind it two doctors and a military general from the planet Crakubine watched with anticipation.

“It doesn’t matter how much we medicate them, or how often we explain that their memories are false,” one of the doctors explained. “Even the surgical procedure did not have any effect. The minds of these Earthlings are just too powerful to manipulate. The other subject is just as positive of his memories, and twice as violent.”

General Motisal said, “We’ll never be able to successfully invade this planet. Drop the subjects back in their home. It’s time to retreat.”

“House!” Wilson woke up screaming. Greg sat up quickly and groaned, rubbing his eyes. “Oh, thank God; I just had the worst nightmare.”

“Yeah,” the older man whispered. “Me too. But we’re safe now.” The oncologist nodded, cuddling to his boyfriend.

“Since we’re both up, we might as well have some fun,” Jimmy added. House smiled and climbed onto Wilson’s lap. Then, he pinched the younger man on the belly. “Ow! What was that for?”

“Just making sure this isn’t a dream.”

“You’re supposed to pinch yourself.”

“Opps, I’ll do that next time,” House promised but Wilson doubted that very much.

[mnstrtruckslash.livejournal.com]

dummy #3

[mnstrtruckslash.livejournal.com]

57 Fails Medical school

“Dr. Wilson I presume,” Dr. House says with a chuckle. I don’t care what the other med students say about him. House is brilliant, and funny, and amazing. “Shouldn’t you be downstairs with the other babies? It’s graduation day. Big deal for most people, all the smiling parents and hugging grandparents or whatever…” I can feel my hand on the back of my neck, rubbing it kind of roughly. I haven’t told anyone yet. But when they don’t call my name, my parents will figure it out.

“I’m not graduating today. I failed my boards. My brother is Schizophrenic and he ran away from home last year. The night before the test, I saw him on a street corner. I spent the rest of the night looking for him. I failed the test,” I confess.

“Alright, well that sucks but you can take the test again in six months. You’re a smart kid. You’ll pass it for sure,” he swears, patting me on the shoulder.

“You think so?” House nods and pulls away slightly. “My parents are gonna kill me though, and nobody’s gonna want to hire the idiot who failed his boards.”

“Screw your parents. And I’ll put in a good word for you here as soon as you past your test.” I nod, and can’t help but smile.

[srsly-yes.livejournal.com]

Posted by a dummy. Er, dummy post.

[alternatealto.livejournal.com]

My turn for a dummy post!

[alternatealto.livejournal.com]

Okay, I'm back! I had Prompt "43: Wins an Award! They made a mistake." Here's my story:

“SURPRISE!!!!”

Wilson looked around his office in understandable bewilderment. He’d been assigned to take a group of new medical students on their initial tour of the hospital and had finally made it back to the fourth floor after a somewhat harrowing morning.

Really, he should have expected House to play some kind of prank – but hiding out under a sheet on a table in the mortuary and slowly sitting up in front of eight impressionable young adults was a first. One girl had fainted and another had twisted her ankle in the ensuing stampede out of the room.

Now this. Everyone in the Department of Oncology and a good share of his colleagues in other sections seemed to be crowded into his office. There was a cake in the middle of his desk, with Cuddy beaming at him from behind it. He had no idea what this could be about; he stared around the room with an uncertain, if charming, smile, then looked inquiringly at the Dean of Medicine.

“Congratulations, Doctor Wilson, on your induction into the National Oncology Association’s Clinical Oncology Hall of Fame as Clinical Oncologist of the Year. We’re very proud to have you on the staff here at Princeton Plainsboro Teaching Hospital,” Cuddy announced.

How she’d managed to get through all that mouthful without stumbling, Wilson couldn’t imagine. He smiled modestly and tried to look suitably honored and humble in front of his coworkers, who, had they been able to hear his thoughts, might have been shocked.

I’m going to kill him. This time, I’m really going to kill him.

Cuddy handed him the framed Certificate while the crowd snapped pictures with their cellphones. He cut the cake, distributed pieces to everyone, smiled and chatted and repeated over and over what a surprise this was and how honored he felt. Gradually, the crowd faded away as people returned to work, until only Wilson and Cuddy remained. The Dean smiled at him as she prepared to leave.

“Congratulations again, Doctor Wilson.”

“Um . . . about that. We need to talk. I wasn’t about to make a fuss in front of everybody, but there isn’t any such organization as the National Oncology Association.”

Cuddy’s pleasant smile froze as she realized what this must mean. “House!” she spluttered, suddenly looking murderous.

Wilson, examining the framed Certificate, pointed out the signatures at the bottom. “Dr. S. Arcoma and Dr. C. Hemo. Unusually appropriate names for oncologists, don’t you think?”

It was at just that moment that his office door opened and House sauntered in. “Someone said there was cake,” he announced.

Wilson and Cuddy exchanged glances. Then, as one, they picked up the remains of the sheet cake.

It had been a definite tactical error on House’s part to close the door behind him.

[jahmat.livejournal.com]

My mother wants to know why I laugh so much when I'm on the computer. She's a non-House fan and wouldn't understand most of the humor, but I've love to have her read this one!

Your awesomeness is endless!

[jezziejay.livejournal.com]

dummy post...

[jezziejay.livejournal.com]

Mugging Haiku

There is blood and pain
but no watch and no wallet
his last thought is House.

[menolly-au.livejournal.com]

I hope his last thought as he slips into unconciousness or something, not his last thought ever....

Wonderfully angsty haiku :)

[stare-me-out.livejournal.com]

Dummy post.

[stare-me-out.livejournal.com]

Same Day Repeating Haiku (bonus!work because I can't read the time)

The alarm goes off,
waking nightmare, familiar.
Stuck in a moment.

[stare-me-out.livejournal.com]

Dummy post.

[stare-me-out.livejournal.com]

Paternity Suit


He considers, briefly, just paying the child support that Anna, a one night stand from 12 years ago demands, but $500,000 is asking too much for a kid who isn't, can't possibly be, his.

So he testifies in court and the depressing truth becomes public record.

He recounts the intimate details of trying, and failing to have children with Bonnie for the court.

Explains for all and sundry that tests showed he has azoospermia, a total lack of sperm in his semen, probably caused by a bout of the mumps at sixteen.

Anna drops the case.

He feels hollow, alone.

[stare-me-out.livejournal.com]

Dummy post the third.